We made a miscake (er - mistake)
Well, this is embarrassing! Somehow* our Victorian, New South Wales and Queensland warehouses ended up with toilet paper with a misprint on the packaging. Yup! We have boxes that say 2-ply and have the wrong wrappers (inside is actually our premium 3-ply bamboo TP). We didn’t want to throw them out, so we thought we’d turn our whoops into a whoopie!
So we’re bringing you a very special limited edition...with a FREE WHOOPIE cushion in every box!!!!
*It’s all Phil’s fault.
2-ply toilet paper • 100% bamboo • 50% of profits donated • We blame Phil • Free whoopie cushion
Whoops! Edition Toilet Paper
48 double length rolls for $56
SOLD OUT :'(
Toilet paper nerds, click here for product details
What's the whoops?
The box says 2-ply but it’s really 3-ply toilet paper. And the wrappers have the colourful recycled range patterns, but the TP is 100% bamboo. Rest assured, a severe punishment has been handed to the man responsible. Phil has personally tested over 100 whoopie cushions to ensure a surround sound experience.
Free whoopie cushion!
Yes, you get a self-inflating whoopie cushion with every purchase. Why self-inflating? Because even jokers are too time poor to re-inflate their own cushions. Another key thing to note is, based on our rigorous user testing, you have about 36 farts worth of laughs, so look out grandma, we’re coming for you.
Want to try before you buy?
We get it, this is an important purchase. Please turn the sound up and tell your boss you have to show them a spreadsheet or something.
FAQs
- Q. Who is Phil?
- A. He’s our head of production and sales. He’s not really to blame, but he does things like go for runs at lunchtime which he calls ‘trundles’ and wears bike pants. Oh, and he’s English. While this all should be explanation enough, we interviewed him (see below) to uncover exactly what went wrong.
- Q. Can you explain The Whoops! Limited Edition one more time?
- A. Sure can! The box says 2-ply but it’s really 3-ply toilet paper. And the wrappers have the colourful recycled range patterns, but it’s our premium 100% bamboo TP inside. Clear. As. Mud.
- Q. Why do the Eastern states get all the fun stuff like Whoops! and overpriced housing?
- A. We hear you the rest of Australia. We really wanted this to be available for everyone, but it would have been really expensive and a lot of extra work to ship our Whoops! boxes all around the country. So our boxes are staying put and we’re praying that The Whoops! Limited Edition does not overtake sport in interstate rivalry.
- Q. What’s Britney Spears up to?
- A. We’re not sure. We really just wanted to write a gag around (Wh)Oops I Did It Again. But then we found out it was oops, not whoops. Whoops!
- Q. What’s the difference between a whoops and an oops?
- A. An oops is a small whoops. Like oops, I accidentally ate the last cookie. A whoops is a bigger mistake. Like whoops, I just ate the entire pack of cookies and then dinged your car.
- Q. I’ve recently done a whoops, how can I recover from it?
- A. It depends. Please choose from one of the frequent whoopses below:
Whoops: Tripped in public...
Recovery: Jazz handsWhoops: Drunk dialing...
Recovery: Keep drinkingWhoops: Accidental all staff email...
Recovery: giphy.com/search/kittensWhoops: Dress tucked in stockings...
Recovery: Move cityWhoops: Fly undone...
Recovery: Distract with crazy armsWhoops: Waved hello to wrong person...
Recovery: Stretch it outWhoops: Forgot anniversary...
Recovery: PoetryWhoops: Shrunk fave t-shirt...
Recovery: DenialWhoops Recovery Tripped in public Jazz hands Drunk dialing Keep drinking Accidental all staff email giphy.com/search/kittens Dress tucked in stockings Move city Fly undone Distract with crazy arms Waved hello to wrong person Stretch it out Forgot anniversary Poetry Shrunk fave t-shirt Denial
Meet Phil
Phil, thanks for joining us. Tell us the exact moment you discovered your whoops?
First, to clarify, this is actually our co-founder Danny’s mistake, but he said it was James’ (our head of logistics) fault. Then James said it was my fault, and whoever’s name is said last always gets blamed...
I discovered the whoops by text message. We made these wrappers because we were testing 2-ply bamboo toilet paper in the USA. We tested them briefly, but Danny messaged me one night saying we weren’t going to sell them there anymore. I was like, “but, but..noooo. We have a shed load of boxes and wrappers with 2 ply on them.”
Long story short, we ended up with a whole lotta the wrong packaging here in our Australian East Coast warehouses. And now everybody is picturing me in bike pants.
Describe how it made you feel?
Like I just announced La La Land won. No, no, I mean Moonlight.
Is this a one off whoops, or would you describe yourself as a frequent whoop-ser?
I make omelettes. Sometimes, eggs get broken.
What life lessons have you learned from your whoops?
Don’t trust Danny or James.
Tell us about your bike pants - did they had anything to do with this incident?
Not initially, but I wore them during whoopie cushion testing.
If you had one piece of advice for people who are about to make a whoops, what would it be?
Own it. And if you can’t own it, run (in bike pants).
Phil’s only human, so if you’d like to make him feel better about his monumental mistake, please email him words of encouragement at phil@whogivesacrap.org
